Saturday, 6 October 2012

Published at last

I have long been a frustrated author. Being a writer is something that I have always wanted to do. There is a literary bent in the family so I guess this isn't all that unusual.

If I was being honest with myself the reason that I have never really pursued writing as a career option is a lack of confidence and drive. The started  with being dissuaded from a potential career as a journalist by well a well meaning but in hindsight incompetent careers advisor at school. She suggested I start an apprenticeship as a typesetter instead. Continued with family and friends telling me that I needed a real job, rejection and my own lack of confidence.

This isn't to say that I haven't written, submitted work to publishers or even had a go at self publishing. When I might have given this a real go the realities of earning a living, mortgages and a need for some kind of financial security got in the way.

Latterly I have been interested in playing with helmet cams and writing or even thinking about it hasn't been high on my list of priorities.

Cue a life changing event, the end of a relationship that I thought was the real deal, a new relationship and the gift of a Kindle.

Among other things the Kindle reinvigorated my interest in reading. I have been at times a voracious reader and have often probably withdrawn from the real world and into the world of  print more often that I should have. Latterly I have become much more picky in my reading and loathe to spend money on books from authors that weren't on my personal safe list.

The Kindle has changed all this and while I still buy from mainstream authors there are huge numbers of free or very cheap tittles available that I have entertained myself with. As I have sampled the good, bad and barely readable I came to the realisation that my work is at least as good if not better than some of the titles I was reading and in many cases paying for.

Over the last several months I  have dusted off, reviewed and honed one of my masterpieces and in the last week or so published it on Amazon.

I know there are other platforms to use and maybe I will review them in time but Amazon is the industry standard for self publishing and once I had sorted out the formatting issues the process is painless.

So read the book if you have the time and interest and if you do keep an eye out for the sequel that i am busy polishing and updating.

Kindle version or Buy a hard copy version

Brrrp - now I need to check the bike out because I haven't ridden it in months.......

Saturday, 16 June 2012

What a difference a year makes

What a difference a year makes. This time last year I was desperately unhappy and couldn't really pin down as to why this would be because outwardly things were pretty good in my life. 

Recently one of my work colleagues described how some of her employees were feeling after flipping out at work in Christchurch.

It's a feeling that something is just wrong and they can't explain why. Not surprising when you are living in a city where the ground is likely to move underneath you at any time. Where your house might be damaged and you have an interminable wait for repairs, or it has extra ventilation and is impossible to keep warm. Where everywhere you look there are signs of damage that will take years to put right even if your own home is more or less ok. Or you might have to move out of your house and you don't know where to go and what to do next

I sat in an office on Friday close to the Christchurch Airport wondering if each rattle of the windows or roar of  jet engine winding up was an more earthly rattle. A little on edge all that time and counting down the hours until I was due to fly out. So I understand and when she explained how these people were feeling it seemed to encapsulate just how I had been feeling for such a long time.

 A sense of impending doom. Something was wrong and when I did find out why I felt that way it seemed that the end of the world had come.

Of course it hadn't, though it seemed that way at the time. Today I am much happier, happier than  I can remember being for many years. Because it isn't the end of the world when a relationship ends when your partner decides that the grass is greener over the fence. 

Despite how I felt at the time, that the world had passed me by and I had wasted a chunk of my life on someone who then proceeded to look elsewhere, that I would never know love in my life again, my world is a far better place today.

The emotional trauma of the last part of 2011 has left me a much stronger and rounded as a person that is reflected in my work as well as my personal life and especially in my relationships with people.

Although I wouldn't wish a  relationship breakdown to my worst enemy there are upsides if you emerge from the darkside, not least the new good woman in my life.